Today I want to talk about our motivation for each of our choices in life. Everyone’s are different and I think once you figure out the main thing that’s driving you to do everything you do, or why you want everything you want, then your life gets a new level of clarity.
Why is it important to know why we do what we do?
If we don’t know why we are doing what we do then we are way more likely to end up doing things we don’t necessarily like. Also, if we don’t realize why we want something and just mindlessly keep working towards it, then when we get it we might realize it doesn’t fulfill the need we had thought it would.
Examing our motivations also allows us to get to know ourselves better and then make future decisions that aline more with who we are. This can help us to create a better future for ourselves and to be happier in the long run.
How to figure out what is the reason behind each of our goals
When first trying to figure out the reason behind our dreams, it can be difficult to pinpoint the main reason straightaway. I’ll give an example. Let’s say the goal you are trying to find your main motivation behind is getting a high-paying job. Ask yourself what is the reason you want the job. First, you might think of a surface-level answer that doesn’t give you much insight. You might say “my reason behind wanting a high-paying job is that is I want more money”. Well, that is the reason you want the job but it’s not really the core reason behind wanting it so you need to look deeper. Then you have to ask yourself “why do I want more money?”, and you might come up with an answer like well I want to buy a house”. This is still a surface-level reason so you need to look deeper. Continually ask yourself why until you get to the core reason.
So with our example, let’s say you end up saying ” I want to own my own house because I don’t want to worry about being evicted or not having enough money for rent”. The real main reason in this example is that you want a feeling of safety and security or just peace of mind that you will be safe.
Now you have your reason, you might think “Oh, well now I know I want safety and peace of mind, how does that help me?”. Here’s where I think this exercise comes in useful. If you were to get your house after getting the job you wanted, that doesn’t guarantee that you will feel safe and at peace of mind from then on. You might start to worry that someone might break into the house or that it could catch on fire or a host of other crazy things that might not happen where your feelings of safety are at risk. The house doesn’t actually give you a feeling of safety although we like to assume that it would.
This is where you need to look internally at your belief systems about safety or peace of mind and examine what kind of beliefs you hold about them. Ask yourself is it possible for me to feel those feelings of safety and peace of mind right now even though I don’t have the external circumstance. How could you give yourself a feeling of safety more on a daily basis? If you are into stuff like reiki or meditation you could do a reiki healing for security or meditate on the idea. Another common reason behind people wanting more money is that they feel a lack of freedom so if that was one of your reasons then you could look at how you could bring more freedom into your life or work on issues you have where you don’t feel free.
Are our feelings linked to what happens to us?
I think that a lot of us think that our internal feelings are linked with things that happen externally to us. We think that because certain things happen that we are going to feel a certain way but the fact that panic disorders and anxiety exist shows that it’s not necessarily our external reality that causes us the feelings we are experiencing. Someone could be completely safe in a calm, secure environment and have a panic attack, and likewise, someone else could go through a really dangerous traumatic life event and feel calm throughout it.
I have recently been thinking about all of this and questioning my reason behind why I want certain things. I actually came up with a common reason behind 90% of the things I want. I want to feel a sense of peace and not have to worry. So I am now working on trying to bring more feelings of peace into my daily life. You don’t have to have one common reason behind everything you do, although by examing a number of current goals you can sometimes realize you have the same reason behind all of them.
I hope you enjoyed this post and it was somewhat comprehensible. If you have any tips for anyone else about this topic then be sure to leave a comment below. Also, make sure to Pin it on Pinterest or share it so that more people can read it. I hope you have a great day and I’ll talk to you soon.
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